I get it. I’ve been lucky with a supportive network, but when friends and family are maybe not the most supportive of your diet or forget that you have restrictions, what are you to do?! You still have to stick with your diet, especially if it affects your health and wellbeing.
Maybe you’re going to a family function or a friend’s dinner party? It can be awkward and may even give you anxiety at the thought of coming across rude. No one wants to tell the host or hostess, “I can’t eat that.” It can leave the host scrambling for what to feed you or lead to the uncomfortable questions of why and more questions after that.
Rest assured, I have come up with a few ideas that I myself had to undertake:
1. Let go of “perfect”
Yes, that’s right, perfectionism is not key. Being lectin-free has many restrictions, which can make it seem impossible to stick to especially when you’re not making your own meals. It’s impossible to adhere to grass-fed, pastured, wild etc. etc. when attending someone’s dinner that may not have the same restrictions as you.
So what to do? I say try your best. Avoid the big offenders – bread, crackers, corn, nightshades and stick to meat and vegetables. Yes, maybe the meat is not grass-fed or pastured, but at least you are “trying your best”. I have had a lot of success with the “meat and vegetable” approach, as long as I go back to my strict diet on my own time. It is ok to not be perfect all of the time, granted that it’s less than 10-20% of the time. Obviously, the better you adhere to the diet, the better you will feel.
2. Don’t be afraid to ask
Even living in a place like California, going out to eat has been a struggle at times. I am blessed many restaurants offer the types of fish, meat, dairy and vegetables I am able to eat. My network of friends is also considerably health-conscious. I do thank my lucky stars, however, what one considers “healthy” is not necessarily what I would consider healthy.
I have found if I am unable to find something on a menu out, I will ask for alterations. I do preface that I have a food allergy and have found most restaurants are more than willing to work with you. I have been pleasantly surprised and touched at how much of an effort is typically made to help you find something you can eat. Sometimes I order a hodgepodge of items – a salad, side of veggies, or an appetizer. I have found more and more I am able to find the main course and maybe tweak just a few things (hold the tomatoes, please), which has worked like a gem!
If it’s a family or friend event, simply tell the host in advance. I have these restrictions but can eat salad, vegetables, and meats. Most hosts would be glad to accommodate your needs, but just need a little fair warning (which is understandable!). Maybe your family and friends aren’t so gracious or concerned? Which leads me to…
3. Bring your own dish(es)!
Going to a party and afraid there won’t be anything lectin-free compliant for you? How about making your own dish or dishes? The host would be appreciative (I am sure) that you are adding to the table (but isn’t this just etiquette too?!). That way, you are covered with your diet and you are also providing a helping hand!
4. Offer to host your own soireé!
Why not turn people on to how you eat? I do it all the time! I love hosting dinners and get-togethers that show people it’s really not all that hard to eat lectin-free. It’s an opportunity to educate your network in the most gracious of ways: by entertaining! It has worked for me and my friends and family have a clearer understanding of how I eat.
5. Educate some more
Why not send family and friends links, articles and videos or even books on the health benefits of eating lectin-free? There is a misconception that a lectin-free diet only benefits the autoimmune community. It couldn’t be further from the truth! Maybe someone wants help with weight gain or another can’t figure out why they have brain fog or even fatigue. The diet is for everyone and the stronger and healthier you become, the more you will become an example to those around you. Do not be surprised at how influential you can be, the healthier, happier and more grounded you become. It’s a service for everyone to look within.
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